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The first thing to know about The Ritz-Carlton Bali is that it is not Mandapa. Let us clear that up before anyone starts packing linen trousers for Ubud and preparing to commune with a rice field. This is the Ritz-Carlton in Nusa Dua, perched in that gloriously polished corner of Bali where the ocean sparkles like it has been briefed by management, and even the golf carts seem to glide about with a quiet sense of purpose.
There are two things Anastasia has in common with Taylor Swift and I feel both are worth celebrating. First, glitter. And when has glitter ever made anything worse? Second, American accents. Which, in a musical about Russia and France performed in Sydney by Australians, did initially make my brain do a tiny, confused pirouette.
While Brad Pitt, Liam Hemsworth and Jacob Elordi are all undeniably thriving in the cheekbone arena, it takes more than symmetrical bone structure to make my heart do so much as a polite flutter. A jawline is lovely. A bicep is commendable. But talent? Talent is the thing that sends my pulse into a light jog.








